This might not be for everybody, but I sure like to get things printed up!

Looks so official!  Once you've made a document, you're fast on your way to being Historical..or so it's been said...

This is no time to be thinking of the Land Fill!

Yes, I've often thought abought skipping the country with a few of my closest friends -- but in my fantasy, they bought their own tickets!  Hey, here's an Idea--  Get your best friend to sign up for this deal.  He owes you a favor, right?

Ibex, huh?  Well anyway, it's warm and looks expensive.  You'll need something to wear when you get off the plane from Cancun. 

(Where did you say you live?  Frostbite Falls?)

This guy told me why you're always broke!  (Not me -- YOU!)

The book tells all.  A great gift for the complainer in your life...

So, another breakthrough in weight reduction.  Hmm.  There's two versions of this ad.  Don't you love it when the model's too shy to show her face?

Looks like they saved a few pennies on the ad below--  didn't have to shoot it on a beach.  I wonder where she's at?   Oh wait a minute, I got it.. the picture below is a "before" shot at the health club, and the big photo at the beach (<- over there, on the left-- how can you miss it?) is the "after" shot.  This product must give you a tan, too.

Okay.  I already told you that I like to get things printed, so get off my case.  Thing is, competition's a good thing sometimes.  I'm having my business cards printed by Vistaprint.  They cost almost nothing, and I sell them for a buck apiece.  (+ shipping and handling)

They have my size? Really?  I'll mark my calendar to buy in October.  Everyone's tired of my sad old Halloween costume!

Sometimes a guy needs a briefcase.  Even if there's nothing in it but lunch and a pack of stale cigarettes to prove he quit.

On the other hand, while a briefcase may be over-dressing for that trip to the used vinyl shop in Amsterdam, a well-stuffed knapsack will give the proper impression!

I'm detecting a theme here. 

A trip with four friends, kanpsacks and tanned models...

is it getting hot in here?  Well, Magellan's kind of sounds like

we'll be away for a while.  Fun!

So, what to do on those rainy days?  Get some mica coated paper! 

No, I don't know what to do with it...use your own imagination for a change!

Oh yes.  Want your scribblings to last forever?  Lovely. 

I think Andy Warhol used this stuff.  Or was it Picasso?

Yeah.  More paper.  If you have to, get the recycled stuff. 

Print checks.  Send me one...